If You Lost Your Groove, He Can Help

That title might give away my age, but so be it. Taye Diggs has been consistently attractive for over a decade. He doesn't have scraggly facial hair and there's no paunch in sight. He's the only reason I can stand Private Practice. Behold:

Seeing Taye (Mr. Diggs if you're nasty) in glasses is kind of like the cherry on top of the sundae. And while I do appreciate how great he looks in them, I think they'd look even better on the nightstand.

I'm just saying...

Ode to Ryan Reynolds

Yes, I'll admit, I hated Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza. It is probably in the same category as Two and a Half Men for me (as in it saddens me that this is the most popular show in Brazil). But, oh, Ryan, you have bloomed. It began with a ritual Sunday movie-going event while I was "stuck" in Waikiki for four months on a flood recovery job back in 2005. The theaters in Ward Center had chocolate-covered bananas (not the frozen kind), and so I didn't really care what movie I went and saw, I just wanted the banana. I was going a bit crazy by this time, as Sunday was my only day off during the 16-hour work days of me and Freddy Kruger flooded basements.

I actually think I missed the movie I had planned to see, and the next thing playing without me waiting around for too long was Blade:Trinity. Some history--my father dragged me to every Star Trek or comic book movie when I was a kid, and Blade reminded him of his own childhood.

Low and behold, out of the one-sided mirror crashes a BEARDED, shoulders-carved-of-marble, Hannibal King to save Blade. This not only began my crush on Reynolds, but also my fascination of bearded men. In addition, Reynold's awesome dialogue while half naked after being captured by the vamps (oh, Parker Posie, you rocked as a vamp, but I digress), won my heart. You gotta see where his tat is...

Danica Talos: Okay, King. Where's this little "tracking node" of yours?

Hannibal King: It's in my left ass cheek. [Danica slaps him] Fine. It's in my right ass cheek. [Danica slaps him] Okay, seriously, now: it's in the meat of my butt, just below the Hello Kitty tattoo. [Danica kicks him in the groin] Seriously, just pull down my tightie-whities and see for yourself …

(my hello kitty fanaticism will be discussed in future blog)

So, Louisa, the road (air?) warrior that she is, tells me she is standing behind a Reynolds doppleganger while in line to buy her plane fodder mags. There was a bit of uncertainty whether said Reynolds was actually in line, so Louisa's "pick-up" line was to ask. He answered in a slow Southern drawl.

Therefore, in conclusion, the hotness scale of Ryan is

Regular Reynolds  <  Bearded Reynolds < Spec-ed Out and Bearded < Spec-ed Out, Bearded with a Southern Accent Reynolds

Reynolds as Hannibal King in Blade:Trinity

Reynolds in Specs (sans Beard, sadly, but some shawdowing)